Richard: Tonight on the show were going to look at legs.  Everyone has them, usually two, situated between their hips and their feet.

Judy: Unless you've had one amputated.

Richard: yes, that's right.

Judy: Or you could have had both amputated as a result of having a nasty accident.

Richard: Yes, sure, you're right.  I've never thought about it like that before.  It makes you think about how fortunate we are to still have both our legs, in full working order.

Judy: Yes it does.  We should count ourselves lucky.

Richard: As I was saying, tonight we're going to look at legs.

Judy: What, my legs?

Richard: Don't be silly Judy, who'd want to look at your legs?

Judy: Whose legs are we looking at then?

Richard: Well we're going to have a lot of pretty models coming into the studio, who have pretty legs, which makes a change from looking at your short fat hairy legs.

Judy: I've not got hairy legs.

Richard: And you're ugly.

Judy: I'm not ugly.

Richard: Yes you are darling.  Anyway, as I was saying -

Judy: Is this because I wouldn't give you oral last night?

Richard: Well there is that too, but you're still ugly.

Judy: I'm not ugly.

(She gets compact mirror out from her handbag and looks in it - it cracks.)

Richard: See!

Judy: Oh fuck it! 

(She looks down at her jugs, then grabs hold of them and pushes them up, smiling.)

Judy: I've still got a great pair of knockers though!

Richard: (looking at them and licking his lips) There is that, yeah.

Judy: I bet our male viewers are jealous of you getting to play with these beauties every night.

Richard: Is that why you always have them hanging out like that?

Judy: They're not always hanging out.

Richard: Oh no?  That dress you're wearing is a bit low-cut isn't it?

Judy: One day I'm going to get them out on live telly. I'm every schoolboy's fantasy.

Richard: Every schoolboy's nightmare, more like.

Judy: In fact, I'm going to get them out now!

Richard: No, you can't!  We've got to play, "You Say, We Pay".

Judy: (disappointed) Oh, can't we play, "Judy Gets Her Tits Out On Live Telly", instead?

Richard: No, I love that game, I always guess everything.  Just because you're crap at it.

Judy: I guess them too.

Richard: No you don't, you're thick.

Judy: (looking down at her tits and smiling) I've got nice jugs though!

Richard: (looking at them and licking his lips again) Yeah, there is that.