Dr Mal's Health Probe

Dr Mal is a doctor. Of what we're not quite sure. But he is an expert on all areas of health and medicine, apparantly, at least that's what he tells us.

Transvestites: Troubled Individuals - or Just Pansies in Dresses?

This month Dr Mal has been getting into women's underwear and asking the question - why do men like to do the same?

This week I've been probing transvestites, though not literally you understand!) what makes a man want to dress in women's clothing? Is there anything wrong in it? And what's the best way of removing hair from your legs - shaving or waxing?

I put on a bra and panties, and a rather fetching little black dress, dolled myself up and attended a meeting of medical professionals to see why a man would want to pursue this fetish. I did rather well. I was propositioned even, I had to stop myself as I got a bit carried away ... ahem, he was rather dashing too!

He definitely wanted to get into my knickers - but as he was a slightly larger gentleman he would have had difficulty (getting into my knickers - geddit?)

So what did I learn about transvestism? Well, not al lot about transvestism but I learned that I prefer well built attractive men who look like theyre hung like a big horse! Ahem, just kidding! Er .. Ahem.

Some frequently asked questions about Transvetism ...

What about a sex change operation?

Nasty! Have you seen what they do? They cut your balls off, split your dick in half and then reshape it into a vagina!

How do I know for sure that I really want to be a woman rather than a man?

Go shopping, if you've got your eye on a gorgeous satin glitzy evening gown rather then a suit for that dinner you're about to attend - chances are you're a woman. If you prefer talking to other women about makeup and beauty - the chances are you're a woman. And if you prefer watching the soaps to the football - chances are you're a bloody woman!!

What do I do if my suspicions are correct and I find that I would be happier being a woman?

Go see a doctor and ask his advice - and I don't mean advice about whether your hair looks better with waves or permed - I mean advice on changing your sex!

What about hormones?

If you take these you will start to develop breasts, gather curves and start to think Trisha is good viewing!

Should I start dressing as a woman immediately or ease myself into it, say by just starting off wearing knickers and a bra, underneath my male clothes, and then later when I get the confidence, progress to wearing skirts, tops and dresses?

Yes that sounds sensible, fag!

Will my friends call me a fag if I start dressing as a woman?

Oh no of course not, they'll be very understanding, as I am!

Does my bum look big in this?

Yes, fatty!